I made rent
on the last call of the evening on the last night I was able to work this
month. And by make rent, I mean I didn’t have it prior and I made it all in one
call. I was going to have to break into my
do-not-spend-under-any-circumstance-not-even-for-booze five year savings plan
jar. It’s for a camping van. Work has been so dead. How dead? Two to three
calls a week - in a good week, kind of dead. Having to borrow money from my mom
to take a class kind of dead. I never borrow money from my mom! Getting called
out an hour past what’s legal kind of dead… and going! It’s bullshit. And this
has my sleep schedule completely fucked up. I hate getting dragged out of bed
to go to work, so I’ve been staying up. Then I fight sleep worse than a six
year old, so once I’m in bed it still takes me an hour to turn out the light.
My sleep schedule has switched to 5AM-1PM. I feel gross all the time.
So I’ve
been job hunting. And going to luncheons and meeting executives. I’m taking a
two day class (that cost as much as a university course) in fund raising. I
think I’d kill at it. Hopefully something comes of this. I have a job interview
on Monday for a slit-your-wrists-accounting job. Right now, I don’t care what
the job is as long as I can pay the bills. Cause this is bullshit, and it’s
going to get worse after Christmas.
And once I
get a real job, men will be able to reject me for me and no longer be able to
hide behind my career! I’m so excited. Actually, I have no idea how I feel
about this. Scared? Yeah. Scared. I had a shitty love life before I took this
job. I had a shitty love life with this job. Why should anything change? I’m
PMSing aka feeling super lonely and pathetic.
