In Bed With Crazy

            The phone was ringing when I arrived at his door. It was his home line and he let it go to voicemail. It was actually one of those old school recordings where you get to hear the message as it’s being left. I thought those only existed on TV. I collected my fee and called into the agency. As Tina answers the phone a loud screeching noise goes off to the left of me. It’s his ring tone. It screams “Danger, danger, danger!” and I see the face of a woman on the display. Without acknowledging me he takes the call outside but returns quickly.

            He has booked me for half an hour, which irritates the shit out of me because I have to do equal work for half pay, so out of spite I give him 20 minutes. We go upstairs and get to work. The phone continues to ring. Incessantly. It alternates between his cell and his home phone and it doesn’t stop for the duration that I’m there.

            It’s a shitty call. He can’t get hard, and he keeps pushing for more than what he’s paid for. When my time is up I go to the washroom and I notice a hole in the wall. Well really, it’s more a dint than a whole and it’s slightly above eye level. It wasn’t caused by a fist; that’d be bigger, lower and tends to go through drywall. I turn my back to the wall, stand on my toes and lean back. The crown of my head fits perfectly in the dint. Time to go. I walk out, and quickly start getting dressed. He tries to convince me to stay, but I’m not having it. In the short amount of time it takes to get out the door his pleading has turned to yelling.

            By the time I’m in the car, I have Tina on the phone and she has crazy dude in the black book.

Trash

I went to see a client the other day that had this sign outside the motel. I wanted to keep driving so bad. The red neckery in this area is thick! AND NOBODY SAYS ORIENTAL ANYMORE!!!

Vindicated

Ok, So this is quickly becoming a dead horse which I chose to continue to beat. And beat I shall!!! Hanging out at the STI clinic again. You know. Cause it's where the cool kids hang out. I'm chatting it up with my nurse. Firstly, I love how they treat my job like it ain't no thing. I never bring it up but when they ask how many partners I've had since my last visit, my standard answer is "lots".
Then the job topic comes up. We were talking about the types of sex I have, and I answer, "Vaginal and oral"
"Not anal?"
"No." Mostly true. True enough that it doesn't need to be talked about.
"And you use condoms?"
"Always. Well, during vaginal, and when I go down on him. Not when he goes down on me."
"Really?" She asked. Not like she didn't believe me, just more as an exclamation. "I find girls who work in the sex industry are such sticklers for condoms. Much more than the general population. Women who are having one night stands never use condoms when giving oral "
"Like ever? Zero?"
"Zero," She tells me with her serious face. "Not one."
"Well that's funny 'cause I don't use a condom when it's oral with a personal partner. I know, I'm a hypocrite."
"See!" She said, proving her point.
I don't know why. I know how STI's work. I know it's not a trust or intimacy issue. I just think work cock is the most disgusting thing in the world, and there's no way one could pay me enough to put my mouth on it. Swallowing is an intimacy thing for me and I would never trust a client to pull out. I was out on a two girl call a little while ago (two girls and one guy) and she let him come other chest. We were both lying on our backs, side by side with him kneeling over top of her when he squirted his sticky white puss all over her chest and she rubbed it around her breasts. I caught a whiff of it and literally nearly puked. That's how I feel about strange cum. I have made great strides to get over my cumphobia, but I'm not there yet.
"However, thinking of us as being conscientious is one way of thinking about it," I said wanting to bring it back to that topic, "but if they are health conscious then they show up here and take care of themselves. If they're not then you don't see them and who knows what they're doing."
"True," She acknowledged.
She had me scoot a bit, but my hamster was running.
"Since we're making generalizations about the sexual health of girls in the industry..." I said as she swabbed, "Would you say that girls in the industry are generally more or less healthier?"
"More," She said without skipping a beat. "They may be having more sex, but they tend to be a lot more careful."

VINDICAAAAAAAAAAAATED!!!!

I WIN SUCKAS!!!

I'm so self righteous about this. I love going to the clinic. They're so great there. Even since my last blog post I had another play partner decline claiming fear of STI's. I kind of want to take this and rub this in all of their faces, but the truth is, none of them are worth it.

I'm Icky

            I ended my relationship with Logan a few weeks back. Logan and I have been friends for three years or so, and decided to start sleeping together back in March. There have been a couple bumps along the way, but over all it was good. It wasn’t the sex that kept me coming back, it was that Logan was safety and comfort to me. When I think of him I think of the scene from Traffic where the kid with the invisible cape saves his father from being shot. When Logan wraps his invisible cape around me nothing else matters.

            The thing that ended it was Logan told me that he though we should stop having sex. I knew he was ‘snuggling’ with someone else and that was totally fine with me and I knew that she didn’t know about me, but what I didn’t know was that she was married. Logan was cheating on a woman who was cheating on her husband with a woman who is very sexually active. Logan decided to stop sleeping with me because if I got an STI, it had potential to destroy her family. It’s not the fact that she’s cheating on her husband, and not the fact that he’s cheating on her that puts this whole house of cards in danger. It’s my sexual proclivities. I’m the only one being honest here! So I said go ahead, keep her. I’m out. And I cut the whole relationship. I was angry about the fact that he chose her over me for a couple days, and when I got over it, I thought about sending him a message or calling him or something. I deserve better though. Now I’m just upset that I’ve lost a dear friend.

            I’ve been dating quite a bit lately and the STI issue is becoming a real issue. And I fully respect an individual for wanting to keep themselves healthy, so when they opt out, what am I supposed to say? I’ve heard it so many times, “There’s been something I’ve been wanting to talk to you about.” Apparently the “We need to talk” line is out. I cut it short and just tell them not to worry about it and looked for our server so I could split the check.

            “It’s not that I’m not attracted to you, I really am”

            “I really value our friendship”

            “We can still hang out though, right?”

            Seriously. Why can’t anyone have an original line? I’ve had to sit through this same fucking speech three times in the last six weeks.

            It’s just getting tiring. I try not to let it hurt, because I know it’s not personal, but it still stings. I feel like it’s discrimination. And that may seem ridiculous to some but what else would you call it? Yeah. I had chlamydia. I took a pill and it was gone. Zero damage done. I’ve had sneezes that were worse. The thing is I caught it because I get tested often. I’m responsible for my own personal health. If my partner gets tested often too then there’s no big deal.

            I think I’m just really frustrated because I want to quit and I can’t. The amount I owe in taxes is huge, and it has a 17% interest rate. I’m hoping that I’ll be able to pay it down in a year. A year seems like forever working in a job like this. Maybe I should just adopt a fuck and chuck policy.